Sunday, March 3, 2013

Explaining The Traditions Linking King Arthur, the Chalice, and the Holy Grail or Holy Blood


by Minnie Apolis

While the well-known book by Dan Brown and its predecessor Holy Blood, Holy Grail, would have us believe that Jesus the Christ married Mary Magdalene and left a sacred bloodline later symbolized by the Holy Grail, it may be that the line of descent is less direct than those authors believed.

For there is yet another tradition, or body of traditions, around Glastonbury, that would also explain the pun between San Graal (Holy Grail) and Sang Real (Royal Blood). The Grail may be real, too, and at one time located in the British Isles, a simple wooden cup, worn down by the ages and long use.

For the royal family was not just Jesus, his mother Mary, father Joseph, and possibly wife Mary Magdalene. Joseph of Arimathea was, British tradition has it, the uncle of Jesus, and he was related to Mary Magdalene as well. In fact, some believe that Jesus and Mary Magdalene were cousins who grew up together from childhood on.

The identity of King Arthur is lost in antiquity. Many papers and books have been written listing the merits of one candidate or other as the “real” King Arthur. Was he the hero of the Battle of Badon (probably fought about the year 512 AD), a site that still has not been located? But it is seldom if ever mentioned that Glastonbury has a tradition of the pedigree of King Arthur, one that ties in with the royal family of a minor Roman province called Judea.

A historian named John of Glastonbury provided history with the supposed genealogy of King Arthur. In a book titled “The Traditions of Glastonbury”, the pedigree is recited once again, as follows.

'The following pedigree is taken from John's manuscript, giving Arthur's descent from Joseph through Arthur's mother: “Helaius, Nepos Joseph, Genuit Josus, Josu Genuit Aminadab, Aminadab Genuit Filium, qui Genuit Ygernam, de qua Rex Pendragon, Genuit Nobilem et Famosum Regum Arthurum, per Quod Patet, Quod Rex Arthurus de Stirpe Joseph descendit.” [The Latin 'Nepos' means grandson, per White & Riddle's Latin dictionary 1880 AD.]'

Translated, it says that Joseph of Arimathea begot Josus, who begot Aminadab, who begot [son], who begot Igernam, who begot King Pendragon, who begot the famous King Arthur. While we cannot locate any official birth certificates for any of these people, I think you have to give a bit of leeway in that regard. We have no birth certificates, either, for lots of historical persons that we do know lived and died.

Further down in this source book, one is astonished to read that not only is King Arthur descended from Joseph of Arimathea, but so is Galahad and all the other knights of the Round Table.

And of course you cannot have a King Arthur without the Holy Grail somewhere nearby, and indeed it is convenient, maybe a bit too convenient, that the Grail cup is identified with the simple wooden bowl at Nanteos. But we will state the traditions of the cup and its record as a healing device further along in this article.
In one of the earliest pieces of literature about the Grail, it was stated that the Grail was given into the care of Alain, son of Brons and cousin of Josephus.

First we have to stand aside for a moment and clarify that two different vessels are often spoken of as if they were the same object. One is the Chalice, the cup used at the Last Supper. The other is the Grail, the vessel that was used to catch the blood of our Savior as he hung dying on the Cross, and which has a tradition of being a mysterious source of life, healing and prosperity.

So now, the tradition states that Joseph of Arimathea brought the Chalice with him when he came to the British Isles after the death of Jesus. So then what did he do with it? One story says that he first buried it in the earth of, where else? in Chalice Hill. Now we should state in support of this tradition that this belief that Joseph brought it to Britain and placed it in Chalice Hill has been in place for over a thousand years. It was old when Lord Tennyson immortalized it in verse.

So then we have another question: What did this Chalice look like? It was probably a simple wooden drinking cup, like millions of other such cups in the Middle East of that era. It was probably made of olive wood, a very nice, smooth wood preferred for cups, other vessels and utensils.

Britons believed that the Chalice was stored at the House of Nanteos in Wales. How did it get to Wales? Remember back when King Henry the Eighth broke from Catholicism? He then decommissioned the Catholic monasteries, abbeys and Priories. Included in the destruction was the venerable Glastonbury convent.
The last Abbott of Glastonbury entrusted the cup to some monks to carry to safety. They carried it with them over the border into Wales, and stayed for a time at a Cistercian Abbey there. But Henry's men came threateningly close, entering Wales, and the monks picked up and fled yet again, their priceless cup hidden in their effects.

After running another fifteen miles or so, they came to rest at Nanteos Manor, aka the House of Nanteos. The lord of the manor invited the monks to stay and make it their home.

From this time on, the cup – the Chalice from the Last Supper – became rather famous for being a healing device. Miraculous cures were claimed by those who drank from its shallow depths. The cup was shrinking because people would actually bite off a tiny piece of wood to eat, in the belief that it would ensure the efficacy of the vessel's healing properties. So eventually a glass bowl was cast around the reduced wooden bowl of the Chalice, making it a thing of beauty although small.

Records were kept of pledges given for the return of this cup when it was actually lent out to people too sick to travel to Nanteos; borrowers left watches, jewelry, a pound note, all of which were claimed back when the priceless cup was returned. Ailments supposedly cured by the Chalice included epilepsy, fevers, arthritis, rheumatism, etc.

This continued even into the twentieth century. A case dated from 1939 in which two children afflicted with epilepsy drank from the cup and were cured within weeks. A clergyman wrote up the case for the records. Father James Wharton, a clergyman who was assigned to Upton-upon-Severn in Worcestershire, drank from the Chalice in 1957 and was cured of a crippling arthritis that prevented him from bending his knees.

The Chalice, or what is left of it, bears little resemblance to the silver or gold cups of legend and poetry. The small wooden bowl is blackened and cracked, and rather resembles a dark coconut shell. Its original dimensions were believed to be about five inches in diameter and three inches deep.

That such a modest vessel has occupied the imaginations of millions of Britons, Christians, history buffs, Arthur nuts, and assorted other fans is rather remarkable. The Chalice (Britons believe) is the Nanteos Cup; the true king was the legendary King Arthur, and the Grail is the Holy Blood that lived on from Joseph of Arimathea to King Arthur and his knights, and from them, down to untold descendants. We will close with the lines written by Lord Tennyson:

The cup, the cup, itself, from which our Lord
Drank at the last sad supper with His own.
This, from the blessed land of Aromat-
After the day of darkness, when the dead
Went wandering oer Moriah --- the good saint,
Arimathean Joseph, journeying brought
To Glastonbury, where the winter thorn
Blossoms at Christmas, mindful of our Lord.
And there awhile it bode; and if a man
Could touch or see it, he was heal'd at once,
By faith, of all his ills. But then the times
Grew to such evil that the holy cup
Was caught away to Heaven, and disappear'd.
. . .
To whom the monk: From our old books I know
That Joseph came of old to Glastonbury,
And there the heathen Prince, Arviragus,
Gave him an isle of marsh whereon to build;
And there he built with wattles from the marsh
A little lonely church in days of yore,
For so they say, these books of ours, but seem
Mute of this miracle, far as I have read.
But who first saw the holy thing today?


Saturday, March 2, 2013

A List of 2012-2013 Movies for Grownups


by Minnie Apolis
Now that the hubbub of the Oscars is over with, maybe it would be a good time to list some movies that folks older than oh, 30 or so, can find interesting and worthwhile. If you haven't been following the Oscars or any of the hype, here is a chance to see if you might like to catch any of the following representatives of the current movie crop.
I will start off with some titles suggested by the Movies for Grownups article that ran in a recent magazine. With no further ado, here is that list.

THE BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL- Stars Judi Dench and Maggie Smith and Tom Wilkinson. Recent widow Dench goes along with the others to a luxury hotel in India, where they are pretty well assaulted by culture shock.

SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK- Received some nominations on Oscar night, so you may have heard about it there. Stars Jacki Weaver, Robert de Niro. Retired hubby de Niro tries to make ends meet as a bookie, while his wife Weaver smiles bravely as she hopes for better times. Story is about a family in crisis, yet choosing to come closer to each other rather than run for the exits.

LINCOLN- Won best actor Oscar for star Daniel Day Lewis, and a nomination for actress Sally Field who played Mary Todd Lincoln. Directed by Spielberg, so you know it got tender loving care. A sharp political portrait of Lincoln but overlaid with a warmth like few other directors can deliver.

HITCHCOCK- A film about my fave director stars Anthony Hopkins as Hitch, and Helen Mirren as his devoted wife Alma.

BERNIE- A comedy starring Jack Black as a funeral director who moves in with the local matriarch, Shirley MacLaine. Black kills her accidentally-on-purpose, then hides her in the freezer – of course! Written and directed by Richard Linklater, who gleefully springs surprises along the way.

SEARCHING FOR SUGAR MAN- I thought this might be about our Lebowsky, but no. This is a documentary about two of the biggest fans of 1970s rocker Rodriguez, who come all the way from South Africa to search for their hero. Kind of a “Whatever happened to...?” movie. Directed by Malik Bendjelloul.

QUARTET- First-time directing effort from Dustin Hoffman about four retired opera singers who all live in a home for retired classical musicians. Stars Maggie Smith, Tom Courtenay, Billy Connolly and Pauline Collins. Many over-65 musicians play supporting roles and music, too.

AMOUR- An Austrian movie about an octogenarian couple's final months together avoids sentimental tripe but is emotionally loaded.

ROBOT & FRANK- Stars Frank Langella in a film where a little robot is his best friend, and also helps him get the girl. Directed by Jake Schreier. The robot is the perfect non-judgmental pal for loner Langella.

ARGO- A time capsule film back to the 1970s when one of the few feel-good stories to come out of the hostage crisis in Iran was when the Canadians helped smuggle out six Americans with faked passports. The plot involves a fake Hollywood movie supposedly being shot there. This one just won Best Picture of the year.

MOONRISE KINGDOM- A quirky film about pre-teen romance that was co-written and directed by that weirdo, Wes Anderson. The grownups don't understand, of course, and the kids go thru the chills and thrills of first love in high style.

ANY OTHER films that you would like to recommend to fellow Viners, please feel free to do so. This article is just to kick off discussion and recs and link-sharing and all that stuff. Also, Hulu is offering trailers and/or clips to most of the films mentioned.

Friday, March 1, 2013

How To Make a Simple Spring/Easter Wreath

 by Minnie Apolis

Making a simple Easter or spring wreath should not cost very much, and can be completed in a hour or so. 
This project was one that I had enough props and ribbon for two, so I gave one away and sold the other.



For this wreath you will need:
========================
a grapevine or willow wreath as a base
(the grapevine will be dark brown, and the willow will be very light-colored)
a glue gun with glue sticks
at least two colors of suitable ribbon
a twig birds nest
two birds of felt, feather, or other materials
possibly a stapler



Many of the above items you could find at a nearby dollar store. I have small willow wreath shapes in a dollar store, which was an absolute steal. Many times ribbon that was intended for wrapping gifts is also suitable for craft work. And they almost always have silk flowers in assorted colors.

I am pretty sure I found the little twig nest and birds at the local chain garden n craft store. Many times the local craft supply shops run specials on seasonal decorations, so you might find a little cardinal or warbler on sale which you can stash away until March or April.

Traditionally the birds or nest would have been applied to the wreath with wire or wood picks -- a pointed wooden stick with a length of wire attached.

But now almost everybody uses the hot glue gun for a wide range of craft work.

The ribbon is applied first. Take two colors of ribbon and spiral-wrap them around the wreath in opposite directions, so that they cross each other. (see photo) They should end at the top or bottom -- whichever spot that you plan to place the large bow. You may pin the ends of the ribbon in place to check how it looks.

The bow is separate! This creates the most satisfactory results. But we will save that part of the job for last.
Temporarily place the nest and birds as you want to be. Play with the placement while you can, until you arrive at a pleasing final arrangement.

OK, now you have wrapped the ribbon as you wish, with the ends pinned. Take your glue gun and carefully apply glue to the ends of the ribbon and affix them in place. This is a key tip now: do not glue your fingers or hands!

Next affix the nest a little off-center near the bottom edge of the wreath. I say off-center because you may wish to place it closer to the mama bird.
The birds come next. Notice where exactly the back of the birds makes contact with the wreath surfaces, and place a gob of glue there.

The bow is made separately, as I said. Now sit down with your ribbon and either by hand or with one of those inexpensive bow-maker gadgets, create your bow. The secret of making a good bow is to not make it so large that it overwhelms the item to which it will be affixed.

Here I had two colors of ribbon that I thought looked well together. The one ribbon was narrower than the other. I laid one ribbon on top of the other so that the wider ribbon showed on either side of the narrow ribbon, and I kept them together as I made the loops of the bow. This is a bit tricky so if you have to use some waste ribbon on practice bows, go ahead and do that first.

Allow plenty of extra ribbon to extend from the end of the bow; you can use these to tie it onto the wreath, although you will clip the ends and use other pieces of ribbon to make the long decorative ends.

If not using a bow-maker, you can stabilize all the layers of ribbon in the bow with a stapler. To hide the staple, you make a little curl of ribbon inside the smallest loop, and place the staple inside the loop.

Cut separate lengths of ribbon, layer them as you did with the bow, and attach to the bottom of the bow's plastic base, if using the bow-maker gadget. If you are not using a bow-maker, attach the long pieces to the bottom of the bow with a stapler.

You can now glue the bow onto the wreath, or tie it on with the ends of the ribbon which I advised you to leave as long as possible. Obviously if you did not leave enough ribbon to tie it on, you will have to resort to the glue gun yet again. This shows the importance of reading through the directions before you start, hey?

So if the craftsy gods have favored you today, you now have a serviceable spring wreath that you can hang on the front door or in the living room or wherever you wish.

Alternative decorations for the wreath include little plastic or real eggshells that are hung from lengths of ribbon so that the egg is within the inner circle of the wreath. This usually takes from two to five such eggs, at different lengths, for a pleasing result.

Saturday, February 16, 2013

A Little Early for April Fools', But A Good (if weird) Practical Joke Nonetheless


by Minnie Apolis

It is a mere seven weeks until April Fools' day, but I heard about a pretty well-executed practical joke and just had to tell ya about it.
It goes like this. Guy lives in a dorm, right? Does his own laundry, right? Does some separating of clothing like normal, not all whites together because there are not enough white items to make a load, but separates by hot and cold wash and stuff like that.

Somehow some dorky friends of his talked their way into the room with some bs story while the guy is out. (now this part is a bit EWW here) They take all his dirty underwear and wash it with a red tee he has, so that it turns pink. They put the clean but newly pink underwear back in the separate bag for undies.

Guy does laundry on his next laundry day. Dumps the dirty undies directly into a net bag without examining each item of course, and the net bag goes into the machine. In the course of doing his laundry, he eventually discovers that the white underwear is now pink.How did that happen, he wonders? I didn't wash it with anything red, he muses. Gosh golly darnit, what do I do with this mess, he wonders some more.

Well when he mentions to supposed friends that his underwear is now pink and he can't understand how that happened, the friends just about split a gut trying not to laugh out loud. Then they act like he ought to buy them all a round of drinks for putting one over on him.

Now, from what I heard, the guy does have a pink shirt – no, I mean a shirt that was pink when he bought it – so he is not too upset about having some item of clothing that is pink. 
But going back to these weird so-called friends, you really have to wonder at how sick are they to paw through someone's dirty underwear? I mean, what is down the road for these people? Killing puppies and stuff like that? They really ought to be stopped and I mean ASAP. 

Saturday, January 12, 2013

“The trouble with Republicans is that when they get into trouble, they start acting like cannibals.”

(The above quote was made by what former U.S. president? Answer at bottom of article.)

It seems that the quote given above is prescient beyond belief. Recent headlines, indeed headlines from the past two years or so, seem to bear out the drift and infighting currently afflicting the Republican party. 
 
Op Ed News ran this one on January 10:

"The Republican Party: Imploding From Within, Heading Toward Political Oblivion”

 

AlterNet ran this one on December 24, 2012:
Orcs vs. Goblins: Crazed Republicans Turn on Each Other” 
 
Salon ran this on January 2, 2012:
Republicans turn on House GOP leadership over Sandy aid”

And after the debacle of the November elections, the Independent and the Standard ran this one:
Republicans turning on Romney”

Nothing will push the GOP into irrelevancy faster than cannibalizing itself. The birth of the Tea Party a few short years ago has only accelerated the process, not initiated it.
Op Ed's Michael Payne has decided that GOP oblivion would be a good thing:
Watching this party split into various factions is the best thing that could have happened when considering the directions that this country needs to take into the future. Sending the GOP into political oblivion won't happen overnight but the good news is that as this process of political deterioration gathers momentum this outdated, obsolete party will grow weaker and weaker and become a political non-entity; irrelevant and meaningless; its days of obstructionism will be over. 
 
A GOP party that essentially writes off whole states as well as entire demographic groups cannot be long for the world. Rep. Peter King, R-NY, said in early January:
People in my party, they wonder why they’re becoming a minority party,” King said on CNN. ”They’re writing off New York, they’re writing off New Jersey. Well, they’ve written me off, and they’re gonna have a hard time getting my vote, I can tell you that.” 
 
On a lesser scale of importance is the rapid scuttling from prominence of the one-time standard-bearer and presumed shoo-in for president, Mitt Romney. He is no longer the party standard-bearer, and his divisive remarks after his loss in November were seen as less than helpful for a party that needs to build or rebuild a winning coalition of voters. In fact, his loss was so dramatic that his profile is seen as going the way of another presidential election loser from the opposite party, for governor of Massachusetts Michael Dukakis. Dukakis was drubbed in a controversial campaign by George H. W. Bush in 1988. 
 
The most entertaining article on the general topic of the GOP's self cannibalizing is AlterNet's comparison of GOP-ers and Tea Partiers to orcs and goblins. The goblins are the greedy faction who want the gravy train to keep on rolling for the privileged one percenters. The orcs are the ones who flunked arithmetic, demanding no tax increases (on the rich, but the working poor are on their own), and an extremist slate of positions. Last seen dancing around a bonfire of the econ texts and the effigy of John Boehner, according to AlterNet's Lynn Stuart Parramore.

(Who said dat? ANSWER: Former Pres. Richard Milhous Nixon.)

SOURCES:

Eggen, Dan, Republicans turning on Romney, Standard-Examiner, Nov. 16, 2012, http://www.standard.net/stories/2012/11/16/republicans-turning-romney

Parramore, Lynn Stuart, Orcs v. Goblins: Crazed Republicans Turn on Each Other in Ugly Fiscal Cliff Battle. AlterNet, Dec. 24, 2012, http://www.alternet.org/economy/orcs-v-goblins-crazed-republicans-turn-each-other-ugly-fiscal-cliff-battle

Payne, Michael, The Republican Party: Imploding From Within, Op Ed News, Jan. 10, 2013, http://www.opednews.com/articles/The-Republican-Party-Impl-by-michael-payne-130110-820.html

Rayfield, Jillian, Republicans turn on House GOP leadership over Sandy aid, Salon, Jan. 2, 2013, http://www.salon.com/2013/01/02/new_york_republicans_turn_on_house_gop_leadership_over_sandy_aid/

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Book Review: The Swan Thieves a double story of Art and Lost Loves

by Minnie Apolis

Elizabeth Kostova has crafted a complicated double plot. The one set in the modern-day is about an artist, Robert Oliver, who tries to attack a painting in the National Gallery of Art and is confined for psychiatric observation under the care of Dr. Andrew Marlow who happens to paint as a hobby. A second plot involves the 1890s artists with whom Oliver becomes obsessed.

The story is relayed to us by chapters seen from the point of view of the various characters: Dr. Marlow, Oliver's divorced wife Kate, Oliver's estranged girlfriend Mary, and the translated letters of the woman artist that Oliver became obsessed with. That artist was Beatrice de Clerval, a very accomplished painter who unfortunately gave up her career after becoming a mother. Oliver's wife need not have worried about this “other woman” – she lived in 1890s France. 
 
But both women who get involved with Oliver feel kind of creepy about his obsession with Ms. Clerval. Oliver gets into these streaks when he stays up late painting sketches and oils of this woman, over and over. 
 
I said that on one level this is a double love story – but on another level this is a detective story, with the aptly named Dr. Marlow hunting down the nature of Oliver's problem, the personal history with Kate and Mary, the identity of his love, where he saw her, who else did he talk to about the characters in that long-ago drama. I am less interested in the first than in the second level. 
 
My primary complaint with the novel is that while it is good, it could have benefited from a great deal of tight editing. It dawdled for long stretches in which I had to force myself to keep going just to reach the payoff. It wallowed in emotional details on the part of Kate and Mary and indeed all of the female characters both past and present, in a way that the male characters did not. Oh, please, this one just cries out for the Reader's Digest version -- please forgive me.

The Swan Thieves, by Elizabeth Kostova, Back Bay Books (Little, Brown and Company), New York – Boston – London, 2010, 561 pages not including study guide. ISBN: 978-0316065788

Friday, December 28, 2012

What's on Your Good-Luck Menu for New Year's Eve?

By Minnie Apolis

An assortment of foods generally are included in the New Year's menu in the folk belief that they will improve one's fortunes in the coming year. And in precarious times such as ours, that practice may increase, with folks figuring that they need all the extra luck they can get. 
 
The list of good-luck foods generally fall into two or three groups. 
 
The first is that the food resembles paper money. All salad greens fall into this group, as well as greens that are normally cooked, like collards, kale, and cabbage. 
 
A second group of foods resemble coins, or at least is a semicircular shape. Ideally you will have carrots that are cut into coins on your plate, but many other foods are acceptable or traditional representatives of money. The Italians traditionally eat a midnight dinner of lentils and sausage, called Cotechino con Lenticchie. The sausage is cut into chubby discs which are served on top of a bed of cooked coin-shaped lentils. 
Reportedly lentils have been eaten for luck since Roman times. Lentils are also considered good luck in Hungary, where they are preferred in a soup. 
 
Other foods are assumed to suggest coins, although frankly I think they are stretching a point. Those foods include black-eyed peas or the similar crowder peas, which are cooked up with rice in a dish called Hoppin' John. 
 
And to really stretch that point (of a resemblance to coins) you may eat any round fruit – oranges, in particular – or round breads like bagels and doughnuts. Remember the novel Joy Luck Club? The women always included money-attracting oranges at their luncheons. Spaniards and Portuguese eat a dozen grapes at the stroke of midnight. I'm sure I could  force myself to eat a dinner of doughnuts.

Some foods are thought to resemble mineral wealth, as in gold and silver. Silver is suggested by the scales of fish. Ideally one has a whole fish on the platter, to symbolize a good year from start to finish. So don't cut off the heads or tails before serving it on New Year's Eve. Germans, Poles and Scandinavians all prefer to eat pickled herring, instead. Eat it at the stroke of midnight. Reportedly the Chinese word for fish sounds like the word for abundance, another reason for eating it on New Year's. As for the whole fish stipulation, that is a little difficult but I am sure that little sardines will fill the bill. 
 
Gold is represented by anything yellowish or even orange – again, as in the orange fruit. Golden Delicious apples would be good. Cornbread is a traditional favorite for year-end feasts, too, exactly because of its golden color which suggests gold. You can increase the luck by including whole kernel corn in the bread, which represent nuggets of gold. Or cook up a batch of paella, whose rice is traditionally enhanced by the addition of threads of saffron for a golden color. Alternatively, you might elect to eat a curry dish instead. 
 
Still another group of foods symbolize long life or health. Most notable among them are long, unbroken noodles, which symbolize the lifespan. You might have Japanese soba noodles or some Italian spaghetti on the menu. Do not, repeat do not, break the noodles in the cooking process, to safeguard your health luck. 
 
Eat pork. The Orientals view pigs as a very smart, clever and therefore a sign that is usually successful in business, plus they always move forward. You have many options to choose from when it comes to pork products – sausages, bacon, a roast, ham, a whole roast suckling pig -- or even anything in the shape of a pig, such as cookies. 
 
Many traditions have a coin or something representing a coin baked into a cake. An almond often subs for the coin, and whoever gets the piece with the almond can make a wish and expect it to come true in the coming year. 
 
Here's wishing all of you a happy, healthy and prosperous new year in 2013!! 
 
Links to some recipes below:
Paella: http://allrecipes.com/recipe/easy-paella/ (Actually, Paella can be made using whatever meats you have in the frig – any sausage, chicken or pork, scallops or other fish or seafood, etc.)